(no subject)

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) Your stagnant career is starting to stink a little. You're so far down the corporate food chain that the janitor insists you call him "Sir." You're overdue for some professional development, Aquarius. Break out the want ads and find yourself a new set of boots to lick. In relationship matters, a partner is crying out for something you are ill-equipped to give. A visit to your friendly neighbourhood sex-toy store remedies the situation. A coffee date takes a turn for the messy when drinking and laughing fail to coexist peacefully. Pack extra napkins.

I gotta agree with the stagnant career part. Everything else might as well be in another language.