I feel like I'm missing out

GUYS. I wanted you to be the first to know. I’ve fallen in love.

Their name is Final Fantasy XV.

I’m? In a?? Video game fandom??????? IT IS SUPER WEIRD. I DON’T EVEN OWN A PS4. I CANNOT INTERACT WITH THIS CANON THE WAY IT’S MEANT TO BE DONE. I AM REDUCED TO YOUTUBE PLAYTHROUGHS AND VERY PASSIONATE TEXTING WITH MY FRIEND WHILE HE PLAYS.

Let me explain.

So I am very aware I’ve barely posted recently -- about three times a month since March, and this last month it FEELS like I’ve barely posted because it’s almost all been about wider-world stuff. (And even then, I’ve been so quiet given what’s happening? Because British politics right now is BANANAS.)

This is mostly because I’ve been working a LOT, and playing pretty hard too. I really want to do a catch-up post on all the RL things, and also about a bunch of the fannish things I’ve been doing (not so much on the writing of fic, sadly -- it’s been pathetic) and etc. Buuut right now I need to tell you about Final Fantasy XV because it is EATING MY HEAD.

I don’t think I’ve ever been this emotionally compromised over a fandom. I cried down the phone to son_of_darkness (aka bestchocobro/sodsta) for the better part of an hour over the ending, and was only comforted when we made kinkfic plans.

It’s really very much all son_of_darkness’s fault.

( so whaaaaaaaaaaaaaat at least I had the strength to fight )

It’s so great. Like, it’s incredibly awesome as a canon, and it kinda fits my fic interests and skills (dark kinky porn, romantic kinky porn, and punny banter) to a T. Plus I love reading hurt/comfort, and I’ve barely written it ever but I just signed up for a hc_bingo card because I do wanna write more h/c and this canon is RIDICULOUSLY good for it.

And these CHARACTERS. I love them ridiculously much. There’s this enormous muscled bro who’s so kind and connects with people, and lashes out against his prince when their friend is seriously hurt, and his whole family legacy is shielding the king but it’s impossible. And exasperated, sarcastic, fond, kind Iggy, who cooks for them and is the prince’s adviser and strategist and mum friend, and so hardcore and so practical and so lovely. (He reminds me of Giles in a lot of ways, including the sudden darkness of what he’s willing to do to protect his warrior.) Both these guys are so young and trying to take care of their prince, who’s even younger. Prompto, the best friend, he’s funny and makes awful puns and takes selfies with the daemons they fight; he’s the prince’s only friend from outside the courtly world and he gets crushes on all the girls and he’s screamingly vulnerable. His parents were never home, he was a fat (and self-hating) & friendless kid, he worries that he’s worthless and is desperate to earn his place. That his origins with the enemy nation will be discovered and his friends will reject him. And then the villain tricks his best friend into pushing him off a moving train.

SPEAKING OF. OMG, the main character, Noct. He’s a sarcastic little bitch, and he sleeps all the time, and he hates vegetables despite Iggy’s best efforts, and he has back and leg pain from a daemon attack as a kid, and he had this miserable lonely childhood even as the other kids were desperate to glom onto a prince. And he yearns to play games at the arcade and eat junk food and be a normal kid but he never whines about it. He’s so scared that he won’t be enough, that he won’t be heroic or brave enough to do his duty, but he is, of course he is, he doesn’t flinch. *cries forever*

I LOVE THEM. I want to write h/c for their pain and dark porn for their encounters with the amazing, amazing villain. He’s super manipulative and clever and totally wins through his defeat, and he likes emotionally torturing the heroes and touching their faces and being super-sleazy. He’s a delight.

I have fallen HARD for a new fandom, guys. Not leaving any of my old ones, of course, but WOW.



ASK ME ABOUT IT IN COMMENTS IF YOU LIKE I COULD TALK ABOUT THIS FOREVER RN